I was diagnosed with breast cancer in June of 2022. In August of 2022 I had a bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction. 

 

At the time of my diagnosis I knew a few things. I knew I wanted:

 

  1. To be healthy, both physically and emotionally.

  2. To nurture and cultivate my relationship with my husband.

  3. To enjoying my children as they moved from their teen years into adulthood.

  4. To live long enough to meet my grandchildren was my ultimate dream. 

 

What I didn't know was if that was the plan for me. 

 

I was scared, tired and overwhelmed. My therapist reminded me that while I had no control of the situation I could control my reaction to the situation. So I started working on my reaction and it helped me get through some really hard times. The pages below are my story.

 

I hope my journey can help you on your journey.

 

Start HERE.

Practice being the person you want to be.

 

I have always known that practice is a good way to refine skill but it wasn't until I was recovering from breast cancer that I began to understand how much impact practice has on mind set.

 

After surgery I wanted to be a strong, energetic person but I felt weak and tired. At that point all I could do is rest and find ways to practice being the person I wanted to be.

 

Initially that looked like walking around my kitchen island a few times a day and doing small shoulder rolls in my chair between naps. Soon I was able to walk to the mailbox and then walk around the block. Once my surgeon gave me the okay I started doing small chair stretches and slowly worked my way to my mat. After a few months I was back in class at the yoga studio but I had to be slow and thoughtful. I couldn't keep up with the rest of the class, had to skip or modify poses and spent a lot of class in childs pose but over time with practice my strength and stamina returned. In essence I practiced being strong and energetic until now I FEEL strong and energetic.

 

So my advice is... When things feel overwheling practice the small steps. If you want to be a yogi, practice stretching to the sky a few times a day until you are ready to try more poses. If you want to be a gym person, practice doing squats in the kitchen while you make your lunch until you are ready for lunges. If you want to be calm, practice taking deep breaths when you feel anxious. If you want to be kind, practice smiling at strangers. If you want to be a reader, pick a book any book and read a line, a paragraph, a page, whatever you can make happen.

 

We all have the capacity to be the people we want to be. We just have to start practicing.

I am still actively trying to figure out what normal looks like for me.

I am: Being gentle with myself. Giving myself grace. Finding new normals.